This morning I caught up on my homework. I am participating in the book discussion group for Beth Moore's book, So Long Insecurity. When I first got the book and read through the first few chapters, I really thought to myself, and actually believed, that I don't have much of a problem with insecurity. Not that I didn't recognize that I may have had one in the past, but I thought that at this stage of my life, it was no longer an issue. But since this blog is called Just following Jesus in my REAL life, maybe I should actually be real!
I realized maybe I was still struggling with some insecurity when...
I would waste time changing my blog background, like some women change clothes, only to find most of them too fussy or too cutesy, so I would change it back...but I worried that what my blog looked like it wasn't "cool enough"...
I wondered if my blog should be more devotional and Bible study-ish instead of so me-ish...
I wondered if I should try harder to sound poetic and deep...
I wondered what I could do to make people want to follow my blog more...I wanted to be one of those cool bloggers with hundreds of followers who go to blogger conventions and get asked to write books...
I wondered why I care what people I have never met, out there in blog world, think of me...
I wondered if it is ok that I prefer flowers in a Mason jar or pottery pitcher instead of in a crystal vase or if that meant that I am less than the perfect Fancy Nancy's whose homes look like they should be in a magazine...
I wondered why it has been really bugging me that there are now noticable wrinkles under my eyes and a few extra pounds around my middle...
I wondered how I could even think or care about any or all of the above and think that in the eternal scheme of things they even mattered...
Oh boy, that Beth, she's a trouble maker, she is.
I admit it, God and I still have some work to do, right here, in my REAL life.
OMGosh-get out of my head!! ;o) Just popped over to see why Beth is a trouble-maker ... you hit it right on. I could've typed these words.
ReplyDeleteBlessings and Security to You!
Crystal
Well, I'm a brand new blogger and I think you and your blog are fabulous...and real! I was the opposite of you it sounds, I used to think I was a crazy insecure mess, but the more I realize how insecure everyone around me is, the more compassionate and outwardly focused I become...maybe girls like you and girls like me are meeting a bit more toward the middle? Regardless, that Beth Moore really does do a number on us all and we are blessed to receive a peek into each others' lives and hearts!
ReplyDeleteYou know what I love about you? YOU are REAL!!
ReplyDeleteShe is amazing, isn't she? Just wait till you get to the end of the book! God will work wonders and if you let him (as He has with me) that book will turn you upside down/ inside out and it made me such a better person for Him! Hope you have a great day, and by the way, I love flowers in a mason jar! So southernly beautiful!
ReplyDeleteOh, and how do you get your name on you blog like that to say "elizabeth" all fancy?
ReplyDeleteOh, my. Maybe I have more of a problem with insecurity than I think, too. Your post really hit home with me. And maybe I need to get that Beth Moore book. Thanks for sharing this.
ReplyDeleteChapter 11 opened my eyes to an insecurity that I wasn't even aware was one.
ReplyDeleteAmazing what God will reveal, isn't it?
Thanks for sharing.
I came over here from Homespun heart and I think I will stay a while. I have read a few of your posts and I think I will read some more...
ReplyDeleteThis post spoke to my heart as well. Yes, I have done what you said about the blog world. My blog is very streamline now and that is exactly how I want it to be. I am not "deep" either, just documenting my ordinary life about my family.
I have accepted the middle age weight gain and the wrinkles. After all I am a grandma now so I need to look like one right?
Age does make a difference in a Christian women's life. The older we get, the more secure in Him we become.
Thank you for being real in your blog and writing straight out from your heart.