I have always resisted seasons that upset the family apple cart. The storms of life may rage outside, but to me if all was well inside with home and family, then all was well, and life was good. Summers were the best, the girls didn’t have school, and life was good with all the the little chickies home in the nest. About this time every year, the familiar knot in the stomach would come, as the end of the season drew near. I wanted perpetual summer…I didn’t want summer to end, school to start, and the girls to be gone every day. I didn’t want them to be another year older, another grade older. I resisted change. I resisted letting the summer season go. I resisted letting them go.
We have had a wonderful season with all of our children and grandchildren living near and even attending and serving with us at our church. Over the past year, one by one, God has upset the family apple cart. Youngest daughter moved to Missouri. Oldest daughter and son in law are starting their own church after serving with us for ten years. (Thank God for His mercy on this Nana…they are starting a church here in Portland, so they, and baby granddaughter will still be near!) Now middle daughter and son in law, and oldest granddaughter and only grandson are leaving this week for the east coast to pursue more missions training. My stomach has been in perpetual knots, and my eyes filled with tears. I have resisted the change. I have resisted letting go of this season. I have resisted letting them go.
Fall is a beautiful season. If I want to embrace autumn, I have to say goodbye to summer. God has some new, exciting, good things ahead in this new season, not just for my children and grandchildren. He loves me, and even at age 53, He has still has some good stuff up His sleeve for me. Little by little, step by step, day by day, He is helping me to loosen my grip off the old season, and through my teary eyes, He is helping me to look ahead to the future with hope.
I understand what you are going through. Its hard to have your family far from you. My Mom and sisters live an hours away from me. Since I have a fear of driving on freeways its not easy for me to just get on my car and visit them. I have to wait till they come or someone is able to drive me there. The good thing now is video chats. I am able to see them via my computer. I know is not the same but it is much better than a regular phone call.
ReplyDeleteI know exactly what you mean, Elizabeth! My daughter is moving to Mexico in a week to work in a Christian school for deaf children. She'll only be about two hours south of me, but a country away! It's a wonderful feeling that she's following the Lord, but I will miss her terribly. My son just returned from a short term missions trip to Africa. I know how hard it will be to let yours go, (no, I don't really, because I don't have grandkids yet!) but you can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens you!
ReplyDeleteBlessings!
By the way, I find myself humming the song that comes up when I open your blog, and I had never heard it before! Love it! :-)
Oh I pray that you will always be 'heart close'. Thanks for being an inspiring and devoted mamma.
ReplyDeleteAs you are letting go - HE never lets go!!
ReplyDeleteHugs,
~Adrienne~
I Love you my friend and pastor!
ReplyDeleteSimple laughter, going down to your toes, reaching your heart. I join you today to say gracias. As always a joy to splash around in thankfulness. Your blog, simply delightful.
ReplyDeleteSplashin',
Sara