It was Sunday morning before church. The two oldest grandkids had slept over at our house the night before. Our ten year old grandson was sitting at the table eating his Frosted Flakes while I hung that day's title of Jesus on my little Christmas tree in the dining room. "Do you have I AM on one of those tags?" he asked. "I AM is my favorite name of God. God told Moses to tell the people that I AM had sent him. I really like that name." Our conversation was less than a couple of minutes, but we talked about how I AM means that God exists, but it also means He is everything we need. I AM your Savior. I AM your deliverer. I AM your healer. Yes, He is everything we need.
That morning after church one of the young mamas came to me saying her daughter has been asking her a lot of questions about God's eternal nature. Her youngest daughter was struggling to comprehend that God wasn't created, didn't come from something or someone, but always was and always will be. "She's got so many questions!", she told me.
I was kneeling next to the tub full of bubbles, helping my five year old granddaughter to wash her hair. While I scrubbed we were singing, "Ho! Ho! the mistletoe hung where we can see, somebody waits for you, kiss her once for me!" This started a whole conversation about mistletoe and if you have to kiss whoever is under it even if you don't know them and other important five year old wonderings. Suddenly she blurted out, "At school, L. said girls can marry girls and boys can marry boys and I said no they can't, so I asked the teacher and she said L. was right. Then at "carpet time" E. said that God isn't real and in my head I thought He is too real!" There in the tub, her head crowned with shampoo suds, all of the important, hard questions and thoughts she had been holding inside since school that morning came tumbling out.
Maybe it's because I was such a tender hearted kid myself. I felt everything deeply and had a propensity to ponder deep things. Maybe that's why I have a passion to make children feel heard, to let them know that their thoughts and their feelings matter. When Daddy left, Mama just did her best to survive and make a stable life for us. No one, not one person, talked to nine year old me about how I felt, how I was doing. I would lay in bed, tears running down my face, and talk to my friend, Jesus, about it all. God used my childhood loneliness to drive me close to His heart, but He also has used it to make me more sensitive to the feelings, questions and thoughts of children.
On a recent podcast I heard Ravi Zacharias say, "The older you get the more it takes to fill your heart with wonder, and only God is big enough for that." It caused me to think about how precious the childhood years are and how aware we need to be of the teachable moments when little hearts are tender and little minds are questioning. We must be alert to these moments, sensitive to really listen, and smart enough to know that it's less about knowing how to answer perfectly and more about making the child feel loved and safe and heard. Children's minds and hearts are full of wonderings, and we only have so many years of teachable moments to turn their wonderings into wonder as we model God's love and listening ears and as we do our best to answer their questions honestly, albeit imperfectly. I know I failed to always do this with my daughters as they were growing up, I know I sometimes fail even now with my grandchildren and the other little ones in my life, but this is my heart's desire. I want to love the children in my life by taking the time to listen to them. I want to participate in God's plan for them by doing my best to help their wonderings be turned to wonder as we talk about the greatness of Who God is and Who He can be to them.
still following,
Also joining THOUGHT PROVOKING THURSDAYS
at 3-D Lessons for Life
and
I'm praying about how to listen to our teenage grandchildren when they don't want to share. Especially those who don't understand who God is.
ReplyDelete~Adrienne~
There's a whole other level of love and patience required at that age isn't there?
DeleteI think it our greatest role as grand parents. To listen. To encourage. To pray for. To challenge the words of the day that they heard and can't quite believe. Values are taught on many levels. We pray intensely for the hearts of our loved ones.
ReplyDeleteThat is why God made grandparents. Not just to do the job but to listen intensely while we are doing it.
I think you're right. Being a grandparent is a blessing and I want to be used by God in my grandkids lives.
DeleteOh Elizabeth-this is so precious, especially the line, "I held it inside my head and said, Yes He is!" You have taught your children well, see how their children are following Jesus?
ReplyDeleteI love your tender heart and these precious words...they are beyond price.
Thank you so much, sweet friend.
DeleteThat is another reason why God made grandparents.....so we can have these kinds of conversations. Grandparents have the time to listen to every word. I recently had the conversation about "who made God" with my seven year-old granddaughter. She was satisfied with "He always was". We have the most interesting conversations when I am putting them to bed or when we are in the car going somewhere. God is good!
ReplyDeleteDebbi
I do think it's easier as a grandparent, since your focus isn't so divided, to be a loving listener.
DeleteElizabeth, this touched my heart because I realize how short our time is with these precious grandchildren and how much more they are faced with than even our own children were. What an awesome opportunity you have with your grands. All of mine live away and I so miss that precious "listening" time with them.
ReplyDeleteElizabeth, my grandkids were across the country for three years for a season, and my heart was in mourning! God blessed us to get to fly there a few times and vice versa. I know how you must feel!
Delete..."time to listen..." Oh, that children, all children, would be heard and given the wisdom of God as He gives it to us...to touch a child's life for God's glory.
ReplyDeleteWhat a fine post, Elizabeth. I felt YOUR heart so deeply. May He walk by your side as these precious children come to you because they trust you with their questions.
Caring through Christ, ~ linda
Linda, you are a blessing and your encouragement to keep listening means much to me!
Delete❤️
ReplyDeleteLove you, too!
DeleteOh Elizabeth what a sweet and tender post. You can hear your heart. I like it when I can hear the heart of the writer. Yes, "I AM." God told Moses to say it. Jesus said it when he was asked Who do you say that you are? It's emcompasses everything. At this time of year, God has been speaking to me, "I am Emanuel. God with You." I like Max Lacado's words, "God came near."
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for your encouragement and your insights!
Delete"When Daddy left, Mama just did her best to survive and make a stable life for us. No one, not one person, talked to nine year old me about how I felt, how I was doing. I would lay in bed, tears running down my face, and talk to my friend, Jesus, about it all" - I was that girl, too - out of those same circumstances. I think we must be soul sisters :) Listening to all your conversations - it sounds like my home, too - Listening is so very important but I thinking in order to have those conversations where we listen - we have to talk about big and little things - just like you listed. They express themselves like that because they hear us talking about big and little things:) Your post went straight to my heart in so many ways! I feel less like an island knowing I wasn't the only little girl who felt that way and responded that way!
ReplyDeleteShalom Elizabeth!
Maryleigh
Oh, Maryleigh, I'm so glad you told me all of this! Think of all the hurting children in our society with no one to listen to them, since things have declined even more culturally!
DeleteElizabeth, I so loved this post & the quote by Ravi Zacharias. I have been pondering quite a bit lately about wonder myself so this spoke deeply to me. It was a quote to write down in my own journal to keep. Blessings!
ReplyDeleteRavi Zacharias has a book about wonder. I haven't read it, but I loved what he said on the podcast!
DeleteWhat a mature grandson you have! I AM is my favorite name of God, too.
ReplyDeleteHow wonderful you are, Elizabeth, to really listen. It's such a gift that should never be taken for granted. It can make all the difference in someone's day. You are precious! God's blessings to you today. I'm glad I listened to you. :)
Lisa, you were the one who listened! You were one of the first bloggers who reached out to me when I started blogging! (You and Jennifer Lee!)
DeleteI was/am so much like you and your granddaughter. Always pondering.
ReplyDeleteLove this post, Elizabeth.
Julie, I guess it's why we write? It gets some of the pondering out onto paper or screen.
DeleteElizabeth,
ReplyDeleteThis: "God used my childhood loneliness to drive me close to His heart, but He also has used it to make me more sensitive to the feelings, questions and thoughts of children." I felt kindred to you...how blessed your grandchildren are to have someone who listens to their questions :)
Dolly, how many of us grown women are kindred in this way; we were once lonely little children who lay alone at night crying out to God?
DeleteMy youngest daughter (9 years old) is asking questions about God like that, where he came from etc. These conversations are great even though they are hard to answer, thanks for sharing at Good morning mondays. Blessings
ReplyDeleteWhat blessing to have a curious nine year old who wants to know more about God and to understand Him better! I have grandkids ages 11, 10, 5, 3 and 7 months. I'm so blessed!
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